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Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Orthodox Abuse And Cultural Forces

For those closely following the issue of rabbinical sexual abuse accusations in the fervently Orthodox Jewish community, last week’s Jewish Week represented something of a historic moment: An authority from the esteemed haredi organization Agudath Israel, Rabbi Avi Shafran, openly acknowledged that sexual abuse is indeed a problem that requires more attention and measures than the community currently brings to bear.

In the past, The Jewish Week’s own reporting has mentioned how rabbinical sexual abuse has been roundly ignored at Agudath Israel conventions. Rabbi Shafran himself has eschewed any calls for a centralized body to deal with the problem, instead encouraging anyone claiming to have been abused to “go to the rebbe or community rabbi.” So it is refreshing to read Rabbi Shafran grappling with these issues in an open forum and writing, “Must more be done? Yes. And it will be.”

But pausing only briefly to extend sympathy to victims of abuse, Rabbi Shafran saves his real outrage — and most of the space in his piece — for my recent feature story in New York magazine, “On the Rabbi’s Knee,” the first report to publicly detail plaintiff David Framowitz’s astonishing allegations in a recent sexual-abuse lawsuit. (The defendants are Rabbi Yehuda Kolko, Yeshiva & Mesivta Torah Temimah of Flatbush, and Camp Agudah, which Rabbi Shafran acknowledged is affiliated with Agudath Israel.) While the detailed and brave testimony of Framowitz received little attention from Rabbi Shafran, the uncomfortable question asked in my piece — if molestation is more common in the fervently Orthodox community than it is elsewhere — must have hit a nerve. Because last week, Rabbi Shafran accused the New York magazine article of “slip[ping] toward slander, not only of Orthodox Jews but of Judaism itself.”

http://www.thejewishweek.com/top/editletcontent.php3?artid=5154

Comments:
Chaptzem, How about a post where all people can discuss the coward Ben Hirsch AKA "theunorthodoxjew".

I think almost everyone would love to learn more about this creep. And I'm sure that many people including myself would love nothing more then to air this sick mans dirty laundry.

Why should he have a free pass to make up stories and wreck peoples lives, all while hiding behind the alias of unorthodoxjew.

I promise you this will be a gret discussion!!

 

How do u KNOW that UOJ is lying? As a victim I can swear by the torah that he has correctly identified at least 1 rabbi molester. Your talk is cheap, why don't u consider the hurt and revictimization u subject us to with your broad arogant talk. Is Kolko's, Leizerowitz's or Mondrowitz's blood (or for that matter thier family's) redder than that of the dozens or hundreds of victims and thier families? What would u do if u found out your 10 year old son was fondled repeatedly by someone he was to trust? I hope u get the chance to experience that feeling and be able to answer this with certainty, Amen.

 

It is true that it is important to have a forum to out child molesters. However UOJ has become a forum for all people disgruntled with the current state of black hat orthodoxy to vent and mix in lies with the true stories. In addition the cursing foul language and all other nasty things thrown at people who never molested anyone but dared to disagree with some of the people writing comments on UOJ opinion is disgusting. If Ben Hirsch allows these things to go up on his blog and does not demand that the discussions go on in a dignified manner then he loses his credibility to.

 

Your next post needs to be about oujews who date non jews

i can give you a list

 

(06/30/2006)
Hella Winston Responds
For the second time on the pages of your paper (Rabbi Marvin Schick’s paid column “Is this Jewish Sociology,” May 12, and Rabbi Avi Shafran’s Opinion piece “A Matter of Orthodox Abuse,” June 23), the participants in my research have been subject to baseless speculation that they may have lied about their experiences of sexual abuse. I find this disturbing, not only for what it implies about their character and my research, but also because it serves as confirmation that victims who speak out about abuse can expect to have their credibility called into question, even by those ostensibly charged with representing their interests.

What I reported in my book was the result of several years’ research, involving not only chasidim who left their communities, but those who remain within them, as well as a variety of professionals who work closely with this population. To be clear: Nowhere have I asserted that sexual abuse is more common in the Orthodox world than it is in the general population; reliable published statistics on this issue are notoriously hard to come by. What I have noted, however — along with many others — are some of the factors that make it particularly difficult for chasidic victims of abuse to seek help and justice: the fear of stigma; the traditional Jewish antipathy toward informers; concerns about lashon hara and making a chillul Hashem; the taboo against speaking openly about sexual matters; the lack of independent entities within these communities to investigate charges of abuse; the fact that offenders often find refuge in other communities.

All of this means that it is possible for abusers to go on abusing unhindered, sometimes for years. Ultimately, however, quibbling over numbers is merely a distraction from dealing with an issue that deserves our undivided attention.

Hella Winston


(06/30/2006)
Don’t Circle Wagons On Orthodox Abuse
Avi Shafran (“A Matter Of Orthodox Abuse,” June 23) quotes David Mandel of Ohel as saying, “The degree to which Torah leaders have spoken out [on abuse in the Orthodox community] has been remarkable.” I wish he were right.

While there are some who have spoken out in clear, responsible ways, what is remarkable to me are the many who have spoken out against lashon hara (slander), hillul Hashem (scandal) and mesira (the prohibition of going to secular authorities), to name just a few halachic walls to inappropriately hide behind, as a means of silencing victims. What is remarkable are the many stories that I have heard in my extensive work through JSafe with victims of sexual abuse, child abuse and domestic violence in all parts of the Jewish community of denial, cover-up and dismissal.

Interestingly, the non-Orthodox often see abuse as an Orthodox problem, and the Orthodox see it as a non-Orthodox one. And it is a problem for all of us. To date we do not have appropriate studies that give us real numbers. But perpetuating stereotypes of where to find perpetrators does no one any good.

I agree with Shafran’s critique of the New York magazine article and his dismissal of its suggestion that somehow Orthodox repression fosters abuse. But I believe that there are unique factors within the Orthodox community that make it extremely difficult for victims to come forward and get the help they need. There is systemic intimidation, covertly and overtly, of victims and their advocates, and even their rabbis. These people often fear retaliation and intimidation, as well as harmful consequences to their own reputations and those of their families. There are betei din (rabbinic tribunals) that have adjudicated these cases that have no expertise or understanding of these issues and no means to protect past and future victims.

Now is not the time to circle the wagons in order to protect an idealized vision of the community. Now is the time to do everything possible to protect victims from abuse. Then opinion makers won’t have to write columns defending their communities and accusing others of having nefarious agendas — they won’t need to.

CEO, JSafe

Rabbi Mark Dratch
West Hempstead, N.Y.

 

Who is Ben Hirsch? Is he a Rebbe? A molester? A molestee? Is he orthodox?

I'm lost

 

Ben Hirsch is a divorced "menuvel" who has a blog and goes by the title of "unorthodoxjew".

In his blog he curses out rabbonim such as Harav Kaduri olov hashalom as well as almost any one with the title "rav" or "rabbi". He is resposable for seventeen pages of "chillul hashem" in the new yorker magazine. He is an "apikores" and will do whatever he can to hirt as many "frum" jews as possible.

He causes his ex wife and children a tremendous amount of pain.

There is a known "rov" that said you are supposed to say the words "yemach shemo" about Ben Hirsch whenever you say his name.

Let me tell you BEN HIRSCH DOES NOT CARE, AT ALL ABOUT THE ALLEGED ABUSE VICTIMS. He himself is an abuser!! Just wait till you hear the stuff about him.

I am not saying that the allegations about YTT are false. I am saying that Ben Hirsch is the last person to talk about this subject and you should get your information else where.

He should be put in "chairim" and his personal information publicized.

Its a "mitzva lefarsem".

 

chaptzem, please post the post I wrote about Ben Hirsch. Thanx

 

Anon 6:25 said:

"He [i.e., UOJ] is resposable for seventeen pages of "chillul hashem" in the new yorker magazine"

And it's "chillul Hashem" why? [and that, BTW should ALWAYS be spelled with a capital 'H',for obvious reasons]

Because it dares to expose to the world the fact that there are men working in our yeshivos who engage in the most vile, lurid acts, clearly violations of Torah prohibitions against lewd conduct -- but they STILL MASQUERADE AS "FRUM" JEWS, wearing their hats and big beards and being ultra-machmir about their kashrus, having their tefillin and mezzuzahs checked, making sure their wives' shaitlach have no "avoda zarah" hair from India in them and a thousand other halachos, and making sure that at minyan, they tightly shut their eyes and bow and shuckle so everyone thinks they are really pious and daven with kavanah?

And for exposing to the world also the inconvenient fact that there are yeshiva menahels and roshei yeshivas, and community rabbonim who KNOW that these guys are there and who KNOW what they are and what they're doing -- but who do NOTHING to stop them and protect the innocent children, and in some cases, actively conspire to COVER UP their dirty aveiras, so as not to hurt the yeshiva's reputation (to say nothing of the fund-raising that pays their fat salaries!)? They give all kinds of bogus grounds for not reporting such behavior, claiming it would be "mesira," "loshan hara," "chillul Hashem," etc?

WAKE UP AND SMELL THE CAT TURDS!!

Do you actually think that because a man is "frum" he is incapable of such heinous sins -- that such things are only done by "the goyim" or the secular "shaygetz Jews," but not by our good, Torah-true frumme Yidden?

Or that all of the stories coming out on UOJ's blog and other forums of people who were molested, tried to report it and were brushed aside or intimidated into silence are just bubba meisis made up by "the goyim" and the "shaygetz Jews" to "destroy Torah"?

How is the yeshiva world's cover-up of such abuses -- even recruiting respected "gedolim" to poskin such things as "without penetration, it is not a crime" -- any different than the games played for yeaars by, lehavdil, the Catholic Church in shuffling its pervert priests around to new parishes rather than outing, ousting, those who had abused children?

If Kolko had been suspected of drinking cholov stam milk or having a TV in his house or timy bugs in his water, rather than sex abuse, believe me, he would have been booted out of his position YEARS AGO. But the Kool-Aid drinkers who say "it doesn't happen in our community" and who are so heated up over not the sins of Kolko or others, but Ben Hirsch, are in effect accomplices for Kolko and every other "rebbe" who has abused the trust of his position and who ought to be unceremoniously sacked.

G-d works in many strange and to us, unfathomable ways. He chooses "vessels" to carry His water who often would appear to be incongruous choices, for His own inscrutable reasons (look at the story of how David was selected to be the king over Israel and ancestor of Moshiach, even though he was the smallest and considered "least likely to succeed" of all of his brothers and was seen by everybody else as of little use other than to watch the goats rather than do great things). Whatever flaws this Hirsch has, maybe Hashem wants to shake the complacency of the "frum" community on this vital but too-often-ignored issue by using such a flawed man as His tool.

Who knows -- stranger things have happened.

 

Anon 6:25pm; Thanx for the info. David Hirsh's days are numbered. Hopefully.

Anon 8:24am; Great point. Both of you guys raise good points.

However you do have to remember that, "Chillul Hashem" even "misah" is not "mechaper"!!
There is a special place in hell for people like Ben Hirsch.

 

I can understand this VERY well. I was TOO abused when I was in yeshiva, and I am still in therapy because of it. Bedwetting, crying, can't even go on a date, because I am DAMAGED. These rabbi's are worst than the NAZI'S. I am worrying about THEIR own children.

 

Jacob: How old are you? How old were you when you were abused? Was it in yeshiva?

 

WHO IS BEN HIRSCH?????

 

I have something to add..not just do these Rabbis abuse, they also bring in filth from other races and religions, convert them, send them into our 'BT' yeshivas, and allow them access to our Jewish daughters, destroying frum families and abusing them...can someone address this problem, as well? I s there an organization out there to call these so called Rabbis to task for offering 'easy access' to Judaism?
People like R' Belsky, just to name one, who go around converting people and then set them loose in our frum world, to destroy our homes by bringing their ugly, non'torah culture/lifestyles into our world.
We are losing our sons and daughters to these fakers and liars...and ultimately, they too become the abusers in our community, along with the Rabbis who converted them...why is any filth allowed in to become a ger? Where is the responsiblity of a 'rabbi' like Belsky and others, to rescind the geirus of those destroying good Jewish girls and boys?
Does anyone have any input on this?

 

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